This Purge Bodyguard Sucks (CH Does the Purge)
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This Purge Bodyguard Sucks (CH Does the Purge)

(siren) (chainsaw sawing) (screams) (creepy music) – This is bad. – What are we gonna do? – Oh free office supplies. – Oh sick. Sorry, we just- – We’re just writing stuff down. – I’m not gonna hurt you. – Thank God. – But I don’t know if I’m
gonna save you either. What a choice. – Okay, well that’s fine. – No. I can’t just leave these
two pathetic people to die. Alright, I’ll save you,
but we need to move. Now. – If you don’t wanna save
us, you don’t have to. – Yeah, it’s fine. – Really? What’s your plan? You gonna comic write
your way out of this? – Alright fine. – It seems like a lot of people would have just left you guys, so I don’t know, maybe you could- – What do you want us to say, thank you? – We don’t have time for that. Let’s move. Now. (epic music) We gotta make it to the seventh floor. There’s a safe haven in
the southwest corner. Fuck off and die pig. Sui! Could you guys have done that? – I don’t think so, no. – No, probably not. You got any compliments for me? Anything you wanna lay on me? Nothing? Save it for later, save it for when I get you outta this alive. – Okay. (eerie music) – I was just thinking about how bad I just saved you guys back there. I was like ahh, didn’t panic. I bet you’re wondering how
many times I’ve purged. – How many times? – I don’t wanna talk about it. Anyway, super safe up there. Doors automatically lock,
you guys will pretty secure. I’d be feeling that right now if I were on my own. – What do you want us to say? – Yeah man I feel like you want us to be way more thankful to you
than we actually need to be. Like you found us. – Shh, shut your faces. Did you hear that? – Guys, guys, there’s
free office supplies. (gunshot) – Goodnight Bitch Boy Roy. You’re welcome. – Jesus Christ dude, that was our friend. – This whole thing is fucked. Don’t you guys see how fucked all this is? You’re gonna lose friends along the way. I’m sorry. I bet this guy wouldn’t blame you though. – He’s gonna blame you,
you’re the one who killed him. – That’s the story we wanna go with so you guys feel better
about what happened, fine. I’ll take one for the team. Anyway, I’m just remembering
earlier about how that guy jumped out and
tried to fucking kill you and I stopped him from doing it. God, I feel like I’m out here kicking ass and you guys don’t even fucking care. – Okay, yeah, I think we’re just gonna go out on our own. – Yeah, you’re kind of a loose cannon so. – Alright, let’s see how
far you little dipshits get without me then. – Alright bye. – See ya. He doesn’t even know he’s doing it. What are you doing? – What are you doing? – Are you following us? – You guys following me? You guys are a couple of fucking shitheads and you need to listen up. I’m tired of playing Mr. Nice Guy Patty Cake
Give the Dog a Bone because I’m the only thing that’s keeping you guys alive,
do you understand me? So from now on, what I say goes. (epic music) Have you ever seen one of those before? – A gun? – You guys are smarter than
you look, that’s surprises me. Skinny looks stupid and
blondie looks even stupider. Here’s a tip, point that
end at what you want to die and squeeze the trigger til it clicks. Kapish? Kapish? – Yes. – I gotta get your fucking
skinny no-good asses upstairs to the seventh floor before the real bad boys come out to play. And let me tell you
something about these guys, they can smell a pussy from a mile away. And you two, pardon me,
are the biggest candy ass pussies to ever walk God’s green earth. (sniffs) Let’s go. (gunshots) – Oh, I bet there’s other
office supplies on other floors. – Nice. (gunshots) – Pa, pa purge purge purge. Purge is the wordge. – Hi it’s Zac from College
Humor, thanks for watching. You can click here to subscribe or click here for some other fun stuff. You can also screen shot me and turn me into a meme with one of the following poses. (drum music) Let me know how that goes.


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