NAVAL CANNON
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NAVAL CANNON


(canon fires) (splash) – Shut up! – Hey buddy! – What? – Do you have any cannon cleaner by any chance? – For what? – Oh… Ah For my naval cannon. – Why would you even have this? – Ah… cause it’s my right as an American to own one. I mean it’s totally necessary for everyday problems like… SURVIVAL Oh… Looks like these two boys won’t be going hungry tonight. – Oh God please don’t shoot the poor dear. (canon fires) *RIP BUILDING* (ded) I might not be a cannon expert but I think you missed… – Yeah… I think I just think of this thing recalibrated. – See cannons are completely impractical. – No! It has lots of other uses like… HOME PROTECTION I keep my cannon under my pillow just in case of intruders. – This doesn’t feel very safe… – Oh! I’m sorry it’s so rude to me, let me turn on the night light. (lights the cannon) It’s also a great bottle opener. – This might be the stupidest thing you’ve ever done. – Probably. (cannon fires) (coughs) Oh! Thanks! Cheers! – No-no-no-no-no-no! – What? (oh i don’t know!) – Alright look, I’m just gonna come out and say : Cannons are stupid. They only cause unnecessary injuries and they’re way to powerful to be in the hands of untrained people. (chuckles) – You say that now but you won’t be saying that when it saves your life one day. – Ok, there’s zero chance of that happening. No one is gonna… – Duh! Dude! Watch where you walkin’! – I was just standing here! – Then watch where I’M walkin’! – Ok… I’ll do that from now on. Sorry Sir. – Wow! I feel threatened. (war music) So I’m gonna use my naval cannon as is my God-given constitutional right. – Not so fast, buddy! (epic music) Uhhh! Naval cannon. – That’s right! I’m gonna use mine to protect myself as is MY God-given constitutional right. – Not if I protect myself first! – Ohhh-ho-ho! (intense music) – Oh shoot… I forgot my ramrod, could I borrow yours? – Sure. (exhale) (exhale) – Thanks man. (intense music) – Oh… Ugh… Do you happen to have an extra cannon ball, I’ve forgot mine and… – Oh yeah no I got you man! – Oh cool. – Ah! – Ugh! Uh! Uh! Uh! Thanks man. – Anything for my fellow American. – Ha-ha! – Alright. (intense music) – Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! You’re going down! (someones gon’ die tonigh!) – Stop! (friendship music) Shooting each other isn’t gonna solve any of your problems. Just think about what you’re… (cannon fires) – Oh… Oh… Uh… Uh… – (bleep) We killed an innocent bystander… Was this… easily avoidable and senseless tragedy… our fault? (tragic music) – No! If he had a cannon he could have protected himself.(tottaly) (chuckles) – Yeah. I guess we’re real American heroes. – We did a good thing today. – Yeaaaaah! – Weeeee! – Hey guys! Thank you so much for watching. Next week our new movie ‘Ghostmates’ comes out on Youtube Red so click the box to the left to watch the trailer now. And click the box to the right to watch bloopers and behind-the-scenes from this video.

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